A few things I've learned...and continue to learn....along the way....
Let go. You don't need to be in charge of everything.
Practice lovingkindness. Start with yourself.
Slow down! What's the rush?
Mistakes are ok. They are how we learn and grow.
Pay attention. Whether you are washing your face, balancing your checkbook, eating a pear, driving your car-put all your attention into each and every action. Multitasking is overrated.
Give, often, until you have nothing left. If you have the right mindset, you will never reach that point. And everyone has something to give.
Before you communicate (speak, write, etc), consider-is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?
Quiet time is essential for everyone. Empty your mind once in a while. It gets cluttered in there.
You can live in this world and not be of it. You do not have to follow the crowd or conform to society. Everyone does not have to agree with you, get you, understand you, like you. As long as you do no harm, follow your own path. Be who you are.
Try a little tenderness. Some patience too. Everyone is fighting their own battles.
Always read through something twice before hitting "Send" or "Post". Trust me.
Everyone knows how to talk. Few know when to stay silent.
Giving advice is easy. Practicing what you preach, not so much.
Only the truly powerful need never show their might.
Add as much positive energy to the world as possible. Promoting what you love is just as, if not more, important as opposing what you don't.
You are beautiful. Every bit of you, inside and out. And the world is a better place because you are in it.
I have been looking at the Japanese maple in my front yard the past couple of days. I finally snapped this photo this afternoon after I got home from work. I'm sure the photo does not do the leaves justice. The leaves are a vibrant red, redder than they have been all fall. If I zoomed out from this particular shot, you would see that the state of the tree, which is almost completely empty of leaves, makes the ones that are still clinging to the branches stand out even more.
In the last hour or so, I have been thinking how this picture, these few branches of leaves, are a metaphor for a few things:
Life doesn't have to be perfect to be beautiful. When this tree was full, I passed by it every day, never giving it a second look. Now that we are at the end of November, most of the tree is bare, surrounded by most of its finery on the ground, And yet this remnant, this far spot of the tree, captured my attention more than the entire tree itself. I didn't need all the leaves to appreciate the beauty this tree produced.
Life is often like that. I am very guilty of not appreciating things because, in my mind, they aren't perfect, whether that's a person, a thing, a situation. We get so bogged down by the enormity of our situations that we fail to see the fine details that bring that pop of color, that note of happiness, that slow smile that spreads across our face. The beauty, the wonder, is there if we just give it a chance, if we just give ourselves a chance.
Live in the moment. We are surrounded by beauty every day, no matter where you live. We are all guilty of rushing around, getting to what we think is important and sometimes what we need to do is just stop for a moment and gaze at something right in front of us. That's what I did when I saw these leaves. They are so red they just stopped me, just like the color red is supposed to do! I couldn't remember when they had turned from a dull maroon to a vibrant firecracker red. It probably happened in the past couple of days for all I know. And in a couple of days, they could be all gone (and they probably will, with the cold snap that's supposed to move into our area this weekend).
And that's the point. Life can change in an instant, for better or for worse. Or...just change, period. If you don't stop occasionally to appreciate what's around you, you might miss it. How many moments have we let slip by because we had to rush to an appointment, or clean the house, or look at our phone? Just stop once in a while and look around and see what you are missing.
Sometimes simple pleasures suffice. Often in life, it's the simple pleasures that bring us the most joy. A single flower. A beautiful sunrise. A gentle touch. Happiness, joy, wonder, need not come in an elaborate package. It's these simple moments that I really appreciate-they take me out of the hustle and bustle of my life and give me that moment of zen, that touch of grace. And then I go back to the grind, but mindful, grateful for that brief respite of beauty. If I stopped more often, I would probably find these little treasures more often.
Pema Chodron, an esteemed author and Buddhist nun, suggests that people bring "gaps" into their daily routine. Gaps are pauses, three small breaths, where you stop wherever you are, whatever you are doing, and just be, putting your full attention into the immediacy of your experience, of your existence. Imagine what little miracles we would experience, what beauty we could encounter, if we all could just incorporate a few gaps in our busy lives.
Ah, November. The month of gratitude, by virtue of containing Thanksgiving within it. There are a few challenges going on this month-gratitude challenges, writing challenges. Let me add another....
The Internet is a fascinating thing. We get our news from it, use it to stay connected with loved ones, entertain ourselves in various ways. More often than not, the messages we get from it are negative, whether it's bashing someone in politics or entertainment, venting our frustration with something or someone, or posting snarky or sarcastic comments. It is so much easier to give in to the negative-it captures our attention quickly and draws us in, permeating our attitudes towards people and situations. And we are bombarded by images and information that constantly draws us down into that black hole, individually and as a whole.
What would happen if we consciously fought the impulse to growl, grumble, and complain? Instead of protesting something we despise, what if we promoted what pleased us instead? It is true that there is much in the world to scorn; there is also much that can make us smile, if we choose to focus on it.
So, my challenge is this: every day in the month of November, I challenge people to fill whatever social media portal they use, Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, etc, with positive messages, whether it be a quote, a photo, a news story, or a positive personal experience. Doing so will not take away the bad that surrounds us, but perhaps, by focusing on the positive, it will be easier to keep the dark clouds at bay and let the sun shine through.
I'm always trying to find something easy and tasty for a portable snack or quick breakfast. Granola bars always seem too sweet for my taste. Nuts and/or fruit on their own don't usually satisfy me,
I was flipping through a magazine I got from a recent trip to Wegman's ( LOVE that store-why is there not one in this area???) and I saw a recipe for granola balls. A light went on-dimly, but it went on-"Hey-I can do that!". Of course, the recipe in the magazine called for Wegman's products but this is simple enough and you can tailor it to your tastes. So I threw these together and called them Gorp balls, in honor of my father-in-law's favorite hiking snack. They consist of:
Toasted oats-you can use any kind. Spread them out on a cookie sheet and pop them into a 350 F oven. Stir them every 5 minutes or so. Should take about 15 minutes before they become golden brown.
Nuts-I used a container of mixed nuts. You can use whatever amount you want.
Dried fruit-The combinations can be endless. I used a mixed berry blend I found at TJ Maxx.
Nut butter-Again, I have to thank TJ Maxx for the peanut spread with chia seeds I used. Seriously, if you have not been in the Home section of TJ Maxx, you need to check it out!
I threw in the rest of the Qi'a packet I had, which is hemp, buckwheat, and chia seeds mixed together. You could also add some baking chips or other sweet stuff if you want. Again, these are easy to personalize.
Mix everything up in a bowl and form into balls, Note: I wore kitchen gloves to form the balls which made life a whole lot easier. If you don't mind messy, gooey hands, have at it!
Place the balls on a cookie sheet and pop into the fridge to set so they are easy to handle. One or two of these at the size I made them should make a substantial snack or a quick breakfast. I'm going to guess they would freeze well too.
I'm going to play around with different combinations. Let me know your creations too! Happy snacking!
Let us welcome Fall
In all its colorful display.
The third act of the year;
When Nature puts on a wild display
Of sights, of smells, of sounds.
A time of gathering;
When all creatures, great and small,
Catch a whiff of the chill in the air
And prepare to hunker down
For the long, cold, deep sleep ahead.
A time of celebrations:
Harvests and holidays.
When families come together
Sharing the bounty of the earth,
Giving thanks for such abundance.
Do not mourn the passing of summer;
It will return before long.
Do not fear the advent of winter;
It will be here soon enough.
Simply embrace the wonder of autumn
In all its splendor and glory.
There has been some buzz this year in the media and in the blogosphere about Target not carrying much in the way of plus size clothing for women. I don't normally shop for clothes at Target, so this wasn't something I gave much attention or thought.
Until this week.
My son had a class at the local community college. Since the class was a little over an hour and since there is a shopping center close by, I decided to engage in some retail therapy while waiting for him to text me. I went into a few stores, one of which was Target.
I was browsing through the "Intimates" section. I came across some bras, made by Hanes, that looked very comfortable-something that's hard to come by when you are my size. I checked the tag to see if they had a sizing chart and according to the Hanes chart, these bras were made in sizes up to 2X. Perfect, since that was the size I was looking for. Since Hanes sold the bra in that size, I expected to find at least one somewhere on the racks.
Wrong.
Hanes sold a few different styles of these types of bras, and each style came in a few colors. Every time I looked through the rack, the sizes stopped at XL. Now, it's possible that some smart gal came through and bought every single 2X bra that was stocked, but I highly doubt it. Given all of the flack plus sized women have been giving Target about their lack of variety in plus sized women's clothing, I would suspect those sizes were never stocked in the first place.
One response I have heard through the media was that Target explained that more sizes were available online. Which is fine, except I happened to be in the store at that particular moment. Stores like Target that sell a variety of items, from groceries to books to clothing, usually rely on customers' impulse buys. You go in for paper towels, and hey, while I'm here, I'll buy this purse. In order to meet that kind of demand, you should anticipate that your customers will have different tastes and be different sizes. I would have happily bought a few of those bras, an unexpected find, if they had my size.
I'm not trying to be an advocate or an activist. Target has always had a woefully small "Women's" department, kinda smushed in with the Maternity clothes. And the quality of the clothing is barely above Walmart's standards. So I don't expect much when I go there and I rarely go clothes shopping in Target. But if a brand makes a particular item in a larger size, then why wouldn't the store stock it? I guarantee that women would buy it-why wouldn't we, when it's that convenient?
I don't expect Target to change its marketing strategy. Thankfully there are a decent amount of stores out there, both physically and online, that have plenty of variety for plus sized women of every fashion sense. It's just too bad that a big box store like Target doesn't realize there's a whole demographic out there willing to give them money if the store would only accommodate them.
As for me, I will go online to look for my size in those bras. Only I will go directly to Hanes. Your loss, Target.
On this Independence Day, I reflect on how lucky I am to live in this country.
I detest politics. However, I am grateful that every American has the right to express their views, whether anyone agrees with them or not. I am also grateful that Americans have the right vote for those they wish to hold political office. We may bitch and complain about our government and those in office, but we can do so without the fear of being imprisoned or worse.
We are truly blessed that anyone may profess and practice whatever faith they believe in, even if they choose not to believe in anything. I often think many Americans take this freedom for granted. So many people around the globe are persecuted for their faith or lack of it.
This is truly a land of plenty. So many choices, so many opportunities. There are grocery stores everywhere, carrying a myriad of items. There are malls and stores a plenty....and that's not counting the vastness of the Internet. Imagine having to stand in line for food and hope that by the time you get to the front, they have anything left. We take certain things for granted: clean water, reliable electricity, garbage removal. We get frustrated when there's a brownout and we have to reset the clocks in the house. Imagine the electricity going out....for months.
And yet, with all the advantages we have, there are still many in this country that are disadvantaged in one way or another-hungry, homeless, sick and unable to receive care, straddling the poverty line. We must be grateful for all that we have and are able to achieve and mindful of those that struggle every day in our country. Do not take prosperity for granted.
This nation has its flaws; it's far from perfect. There is much to improve, some issues more important to others than to me or you. But we have the freedom to act, to dream, to travel, to stand up for what we believe in. Whenever I dare to pay attention to the news, to what goes on in some other countries, I am grateful to live in the United States.
Happy Birthday America.
